Sunday, February 28, 2010

sunday confession

this week,
i filled a bag with kid clothes to donate.
then a friend called -
she had a bag of clothes
for g.

i accepted.

so now i'm right back where i started.
dang.

bonus confession - added monday.
g lost a tooth yesterday,
wrapped it in a tissue,
left it in our room.
we cleaned our bedroom.
like really, really cleaned it.
(we don't have to close the door
when people come over now!)
i threw the tooth away on accident.
when g was getting ready for bed,
i realized what i had done.
so i convinced him that kids write notes
to the tooth fairy all the time,
you know,
kids that swallow their teeth,
or kids that lose their teeth during
sports events and can't find them...
because i didn't want to go through the trash.
yes, i am that lazy sometimes.

anyway, he wrote this note,
"dear tooth fairy,
i lost my tooth,
then my mom threw it away."

i signed it too, for validation, duh.
"true story. pj."

he went to bed,
but then i felt so guilty,
i picked through the trash and found it.
gag.
(well, first i tried to bribe mm,
but he declined my many offers)
g was still awake,
so we made the switch.
and it's all good.
except for the lazy part.

what's your sunday confession?
the confessional is open.

Friday, February 26, 2010

Tooth Fairy or Not

****Guest Blogger Disclaimer*****
This blog was posted by Mm and in no shape or form represents the views or opinions of PJ. They are solely my own unless PJ* wants to edit them.

On the way to G's basketball game the following conversation ensued:

G - who has a loose tooth says out of the blue "The Tooth Fairy is not real."
Mm - caught off guard "Why do you say that?"
G - "Because fairies are not real. But I know Santa is real because he is a person."
Mm - that is logical...."Well then how do you explain the disappearing teeth and money that is left behind?"
G - "It is probably you."
Mm - "Come on. You know I am the noisiest person in the world and I would wake you up."
G - "No, you are not the noisiest person in the world, I am!"
Mm - "Ok, you have me there. But why in the world would I want your stinky teeth let alone give you money for them?"
G - wavering a little.. "hmmm."
Mm - going in for the kill now, "They have to be small to get in and out of your pillow without you knowing. Of course a little magic is involved. " then working Santa into the equation because he is in good standing.... " you know Santa uses magic, how else could he deliver all those presents?"
G - "Santa can but I don't believe in flying reindeer, his elves probably made him a rocket sled."
Mm - geez. "Ok, Santa has been doing this for a long time. Way before rocket engines. Which means he had to have magic reindeer to get him around. They worked so well there was no reason to get a rocket on his sled. Though he probably could if he wanted.....Oh look we are at the school!"

Misdirection before he asks Santa's age ends discussion. Might need to start solidifying this story and make sure PJ will corroborate.

*can't. stand. the. capital. letters.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

hoard much?

ok, i have made a start.
infinitely more difficult than expected.
i may or may not be a hoarder.
seriously.

these items have made the trash so far.
yes, the trash, they were that old.
not even worth donating.
that is SO sad.

1 pair of slippers
(my only pair)
2 tank tops
(?)
1 pair of shorts
(my only pair)
1 extremely uncomfortable undergarment
(so over looking "smooth")
9 t-shirts
(don't worry, i still have plenty)
1 pair of hideous socks
(which i loved at one time)
2 toxic bath and body items
1 loofah
1 soap shaped like a pumpkin
4 pairs of shoes
(don't worry, i still have plenty)

grand total = 25 items.
it's going to be a long way to 1000.

and some things that should have made the list,
but i just couldn't. let. go.

black leather coat
(may or may not still be in style)
olive green suit i wore to my first interview
(10+ years ago)
london hard rock cafe jean jacket
(will. never. let. go.)
sheep sweater
(pretty sure this was never in style)

hmm.
maybe i will have more luck
in the kids' rooms.

Monday, February 22, 2010

not quite yet

m has this little patch of dry skin by her nose.
i keep putting lotion on it.
but it won't go away.

"m, next time you are in the shower,
scrub your face really well."
you know, exfoliate and stuff.

"i don't wash my face."
"uh, whaa?!?"
"i don't like to wash my face."
"you don't like to wash your face?"
"nope."
good lord.

i guess that explains the dry skin.
and i thought
the days of having
at least one kid that
can shower herself
were here.

not quite yet.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

sunday confession

when we first moved to pa,
straight out of college,
we walked into our new
local convenient store to buy
some alcoholic beverages.

we walked all around
and were very confused,
no beverages to be found.

we asked,
"like, where's like, ya'lls beer?"

convenient store guy answered,
"yinz aren't from around here, n'at?"

this is when we found out
that we had moved to a state
that only sells alcohol at
special alcohol stores.
dang.

we thought it was a huge pain
to have to go to a separate store.
and an even bigger pain -
we had to buy an entire case.
24.
not 6.
what?!?
forcing us to buy a whole case?
um, okay.

fifteen years,
and three kids later,
we believe buying a whole case,
or two,
is brilliant.
absolutely brilliant.
kudos to pa!

bonus confession -
i bought valentine chocolate 75% off.
the big box.
i ate the whole thing in one day.
the end.

what's your sunday confession?
the confessional is open.

Friday, February 19, 2010

dear wal-mart(s)

uh, thanks for the warning.
i was not really expecting one on lotion.
so i think i'm gonna have to pass.
no offense, obviously.












xo,
pj

Thursday, February 18, 2010

traitor

g came in from basketball last night.
threw his shoes, coat,
and water bottle on the floor.

"hey, mister," mm says,
"you need to put your shoes away,
hang up your coat,
and take your water bottle to the sink.
i don't want stuff
piled up all over the house."

"well," g answers,
"mommy doesn't seem to mind."

traitor.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

gung hay fat choy!

m is fortunate to have
a few friends that were
born in china.

one friend's mother
comes to school every year
for chinese new year.
it is a big celebration,
and i am always secretly jealous.

while mm and i ate our shrimp,
for wealth, of course,
(at red lobster, does that count?!?)
m had a party with her class.
she got a red envelope,
filled with a bracelet,
a noisemaker,
and some chopsticks.

this year m also got a little booklet
with asian zodiac signs.
i got a kick out of reading them again.

pj - rat, true dat.
full of charm, the rat is the object of admiration. a true sentimentalist, family and friends are close to her heart. her intellect and foresight bring success, money and work. rats are constant seekers of new ventures and travel. (famous rats - shakespeare, the queen mum, t.s. eliot, george bush, claude monet)

mm - rat.
(see above) change the her to his, then add in stubborn just for fun.

m - snake, the original.
a natural philosopher, the snake is blessed with a profound wisdom. always on a mission, she is dedicated to her chosen quest. seductive and mysterious, many are blinded by her hypnotic charm, unforgettable elegance and style. (famous snakes - oprah, maya angelou, simon & garfunkel, picasso, edgar allan poe)

g - ram, the middle one.
gentle and docile, the ram is sincere and kind-hearted. a pacifist, he never questions authority. fueled by compassion, he admires all of nature's beauty. rams strive to create a secure and tranquil environment. (famous rams - bill gates, michelangelo, william shatner, julia roberts, charles dickens)

k - rooster, the baby.
self-reliant and independent, the rooster is not one to seek counsel. she is confident and aggressive and is most at home in a crowd. a perfectionist, she leaves no detail undocumented. roosters will never abandon their dreams. (famous roosters - bette midler, donny osmond, benjamin franklin, elton john, groucho marx)

i surely do love all my crazy animals.
dang, that rooster is spot-on.

so, what's your sign?
happy chinese new year everyone!
i'm off to eat an orange.
for luck, of course.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

sunday confession

this week the kids were home from school.
all week.

i read all these posts and message boards
about kids making snow ice cream,
rice krispie treats,
paper snowflakes,
paper chains,
and homemade valentines,
etc.

but we mostly played mario brothers
and watched disney movies.

i feel kinda guilty about that.
but just kinda.

what's your sunday confession?
the confessional is open.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

my quirky valentine

after spending half of my life
with the same valentine,
i have to say,
it's been an adventure.

i love all of mm's quirky little habits,
that not many people notice.
but i do.

so of course, in honor of
valentine's day,
i'm gonna tell ya'll a few
that i find most charming.

19 quirky things about mm
1. he pays cash. for everything. period.
2. he brings me a vitamin and a cup of water. every. night.
3. if you ask him to turn down the radio, he will reach over and pretend to turn it down. he is so convincing, it will take you years to figure this out.
4. he eats two packages of instant oatmeal for breakfast.
every. morning.
5. he listens to classical music. and enya. sshh.
6. he is a buffalo bills fan. i love this about him because it means he is loyal. and i would have to do something truly awful to lose his loyalty. like lose five superbowls. in a row.
7. he makes the best appletinis. ever.
8. every time he goes out with the guys, he brings me home a cheeseburger.
9. he used to do my economics homework. in his head.
"well, the answer is 42." he'd say, "but i don't know how you want to show it." um, okay.
10. when we were dating i got lots of letters from "tyrone" -
mm claims he wrote them. i am not so sure about this, and i often wonder how "tyrone" is doing and if he is happy.
11. he will tell you he doesn't dance. then he will have a few drinks and you will have to drag him off the dance floor.
12. he makes pancakes nearly every weekend.
13. he loves scary movies. i hate them. i pretended for a while, but then i couldn't sleep. at all. so now he goes to those movies with his dad, and i can sleep again. the end.
14. he goes to the gym at least 3 times a week. every week that i have known him.
15. he could pack all of his belongings into his car. and i probably wouldn't even notice anything was missing.
16. he is much handier than i give him credit for.
17. he does not "let" kids win the game. any game. ever.
18. he is a better parent than me. i absolutely love this about him.
19. he makes most decisions quickly, except when he's picking out a parking space.

bonus - 20. i keep him around because he loves to clean.

so, what do you love about your quirky sidekick?
happy valentine's day!

Thursday, February 11, 2010

what she said

g dropped something on the floor.
for at least the 42nd time or so.

i opened my mouth to speak,
but then k,
our four-year-old hollers,

"dude, are you freaking kidding me?"

uh, yeah,
what she said.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

fridge magnet

on my sil's fridge -

"before you criticize someone,
you should walk a mile in their shoes.

that way,
when you criticize them,
you're a mile away
and you have their shoes."

i need one of these.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

tortilla soup

mm loves max and erma's -
tortilla soup.

he orders it every time we go there.
which is about once a year.
i get a burger.
are you surprised?
no?
oh.
well, they actually make a tortilla burger.
and it's pretty good.

anyway, i found a copycat recipe.
mm said it wasn't as spicy as the original,
but that he liked it okay and he would eat it again sometime.
aw, he always knows the nicest things to say.

m ate some too.
g dipped chips in it.
k gave it three "ews"
and ate cereal.
whatev.

max and erma-ish tortilla soup
1/4 cup butter or margarine
1/4 cup flour
(melt butter, add flour, cook for 3 minutes)
3 cups chicken broth
1 cup milk
(add slowly and whisk)
8 oz. velveeta cubed - use spicy if ya'll dare!
(add, melt)
10 oz. rotel
2 cups shredded cooked chicken
1 tsp. cumin
1 tsp. chili powder
(add, heat a bit, and serve)

that's it!
the hardest part was shredding the chicken.
and convincing myself i did not just make
chicken a la king.
don't ask.
it's a chicken a la king phobia.

put some tortilla chips in a bowl
and ladle soup on top,
or ladle soup,
then top with chips,
i'll leave that part up to you.

we ate the whole batch in one sitting.
no leftovers.
amazing for our house.

Monday, February 8, 2010

1000 things

i recently read this article -
how to live with just 100 things

i am very intrigued.

i want to be this way too.
but i have too much stuff.
and i do like my stuff.

this part got me thinking though,
"once their purpose is over,
they just keep you stagnant."

agreed.

and while i don't think i can live with just 100 things,
i do have THREE kids, people,
i want to do something.

so here is my plan.
i don't even know if it is possible.
but i am going to try.

i am going to
GET RID OF 1000 THINGS.
little things, big things, broken things, etc.

and i'll keep you posted.
with a list, i think.
anyone else up to the challenge?

Sunday, February 7, 2010

sunday confession

we had a mandatory water conservation alert yesterday.

no showering, flushing, cooking,
washing dishes, laundry,
or drinking water.
until levels returned to normal.

i did not cook.
i did not wash dishes.
i did not do laundry.
i did not drink water.
three kids did not shower.

but...
i did take a shower.
so did mm.
i made coffee.

and we flushed.
at will.

hmm.
this is starting to sound
kind of like a normal day,
huh?

all kidding aside,
i think we could have done better,
and i feel a little guilty about it.

what's your sunday confession?
the confessional is open.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

the snow koozie





end of day.
kids played.
big kids too.
life is good.








yes,
i helped.
and yes,
my back hurts.








mm's invention.
the snow koozie.
keeps your
beer cold
while you
are shoveling.

dig dug














this is good.

just a little path.
down to the bus stop.

lookin' good babe.

please tell me




this will
be clear
for school
on monday.

right?!?











































Friday, February 5, 2010

overheard

k, in the bathroom, taking care of business,
"now that's what i'm talking about!"

Thursday, February 4, 2010

dear mr. prius man

dear mr. prius man,

yeah, i saw you flip that cigarette out of your window.
(biggest pet peeve. ever.)

i won't mention the irony.
oh the irony.

not cool, mr. prius man, not cool.

xo,
pj

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

poetry in motion

m, our original baby,
now eight and a half.
don't forget the half.

"daddy, do you ever feel like you are changing colors on the inside?"

mm,
"i'm not sure, do you?"

m,
"yeah, sometimes."

?!?
please discuss.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

in the news

i saw this in the news.
http://kdka.com/local/Braddock.Hospital.closure.2.1461141.html

kinda sad for a hospital to close.
but considering my braddock experience
i'm not all that surprised.

after i had k,
i started experiencing
chest pains.

from stress.
for real.
three kids under the age of 4.
that'll do ya.

i didn't know this at the time.
i thought i was having a heart attack.
everyday.
the doctor saw a
right bundle branch block.
(which i've probably had my whole life)

so i went for a stress test.
at the hospital mentioned above.
3 weeks postpartum.
i ran on a treadmill,
for nine minutes.
because i am a goddess.

then i had an ultrasound.
to look at my heart.
which is textbook, by the way.
"you have a textbook heart,"
the ultrasound tech said,
"if you turned to the heart page
in an anatomy book it would look just
like yours."

"thanks!" i said.
and i meant it.
because this meant it was stress
after all.
i was just crazy.
whew!

then another staff person came in.
this conversation followed.

tech to staff:
"when we came in here the door was unlocked."
staff to tech:
"again?"
me to tech:
"what does that mean?"
tech to me:
"it means someone was sleeping in here again."
me to tech:
"like a doctor?"
staff to me:
"no, like a homeless person."
me to staff:
"on this bed?"
(the one i'm laying on right now?)
(chest pain)
staff to me:
"well, he probably didn't sleep on the floor."
me to no one in particular:
"oh, of course not."

first hockey night

g's first hockey night with mm.
mellon arena.
mm said g was
completely enthralled.

pens win 5-4 over sabres.
pens score first goal 47 seconds in!
letestu - a rookie.
first goal of his career.
1-0.

later in the first period,
two sabre goals.
roy and vanek!
48 seconds apart.
1-2.

in the second,
another sabre goal.
kennedy.
1-3.

still in the second,
pens score. a lot.
crosby scores.
2-3.
staal scores.
3-3.
crosby scores TWO more!
no way! a hat trick!
the fifth of his career.
hats all over the ice!

g is VERY worried about this.
"how will everyone get their hats back?"
"what happens to all the hats?"
"why would they do that?"
etc.
5-3.

sabres make it interesting in the third.
one goal for pominville.
5-4.
a couple of power plays for the sabres.
but they just can't make it happen.

an excellent game.
even better for your first experience.
g will have high expectations
for all future hockey games.

well worth all the driving.
i just wish i had a picture of
mm in his pominville jersey
and g in his crosby jersey.
walking into the arena.
dang.

note to self - take more pictures.

Monday, February 1, 2010

and miles to go

before i sleep.

this week i'm going to add up
our time spent in the car.
driving to kid activities.

it's so cold here,
i hate to even leave the house.
but i must.

because my parents did it for me.
ballet, tap, gymnastics,
choir, tennis, track,
girl scouts, youth group, piano,
violin, i could go on.
but i'm starting to sound,
well, a bit spoiled.
so i'll stop.
(because we all know it's really
my little brother that got all
the spoilin', right?)

i can't say i ever really thought
about all the driving.
or appreciated it.
but i do now.
because i am in the car
for hours on end.

it's a good thing i have
a suv - that guzzles gas,
but makes me look cool,
because the back windows
are tinted so no one
can tell there are three kids
riding with me.

so when i'm yelling,
"no one touch anyone!"
"just stop looking at each other!"
"no, i do not have any gum!"
it just looks like i'm singing along
to a really hip song.
(note - i know no hip songs)

anyway, let's get started.

monday - i don't have to go anywhere today.
i thought about the mall.
but like i said, it's so cold here.
i think we'll just hang at the house.
i am taking g downtown later
to meet mm for the hockey game.
house to mellon arena = 34 minutes.
mellon arena to house = 34 minutes.
total = 68 minutes.
as long as there is no tunnel traffic.
ha-ha.

tuesday - this is the longest day of our week.
mm logs some time here too.
we have overlapping activities on tuesdays.
house to preschool = 14 minutes
preschool to school = 10 minutes
school to house = 7 minutes
house to preschool = 14 minutes
preschool to house = 14 minutes
house to ccd = 10 minutes
ccd to house = 10 minutes
house to ccd (car one) = 10 minutes
house to ccd (car two) = 10 minutes
ccd to gymnastics (car one) = 7 minutes
ccd to house (car two) = 10 minutes
gymnastics to house (car one) = 12 minutes
house to basketball = 7 minutes
basketball to house = 7 minutes
house to gymnastics = 12 minutes
gymnastics to house = 12 minutes
total = 166 minutes
for real.

wednesday - two cups of coffee, please.
g normally has basketball practice.
but not this week.
because he has a game tomorrow.
mm is going out after work.
so i'll probably take the kids
somewhere for dinner.
drive thru-ish.
let's be conservative and say -
home to fast food = 14 minutes
fast food to home = 14 minutes
total = 28 minutes
did i mention it's cold here?

thursday - if you ask me my name,
i probably won't know what you are talking about.
home to preschool = 14 minutes
preschool to home = 14 minutes
home to preschool = 14 minutes
preschool to home = 14 minutes
home to gymnastics (car one) = 12 minutes
home to basketball (car two) = 7 minutes
gymnastics to home (car one) = 12 minutes
basketball to home (car two) = 7 minutes
home to gymnastics = 12 minutes
gymnastics to home = 12 minutes
total = 118 minutes

friday - wait. what day is it?
home to brownies = 7 minutes
brownies to home = 7 minutes
total = 14 minutes
heaven!

saturday - mm does this, unless i lose a bet.
home to gymnastics = 12 minutes
gymnastics to home = 12 minutes
home to gymnastics = 12 minutes
gymnastics to home = 12 minutes
total = 48 minutes

sunday - this is errand day as well.
home to church = 10 minutes
church to home = 10 minutes
total = 20 minutes

grand total for the whole week,
not counting the gym,
bank, grocery store, etc.
= 462 minutes!

no wonder i'm such an awesome driver.
so, how long are you in the car each week?