no fun zone

these days,
we seem to have entered
the no fun zone.

it is kind of like the twilight zone,
without the unexpected twist.

the kids get out a toy(s)
then spend the next hour
arguing, swapping, dealing, wheeling,
fighting, jawing, taunting, defending,
debating, swindling, jabbing, dodging,
weaving, yeah, i could go on,
but you get it.

i am the referee.

and all this just for
the set up!

they never make it to
actually PLAYING.

it's exhausting,
well, for me anyway.
they spend all of their time -
setting up,
choosing sides,
picking pieces,
assigning roles,
and then POOF!

they move on to something else.
nothing left but the mess.
cue creepy music.

wordless thursday

happy birthday to my mom.

no laughing matter

this past weekend our good friends
from college stopped by for the night.
they are driving from
maine to florida.
this after driving from
florida to maine.
with their three kids.
and their dog.
saints.
complete saints.

they came bearing lobster.
we talked while the kids played.
we laughed.
the next day it poured the rain.
the kids played anyway.
i always forget to play in the rain.

when i was putting m to bed,
she asked me to sit with her for a while.
"tomorrow,"
i answered,
"i want to talk with my college friends now."

"ok,"
she said,
"what did you do in college?"

"oh, we laughed, a lot."
i said, reminiscing.

"you used to laugh?"
she said, pondering.

really? has it been that long?

middles

as an eldest,
i don't think much about
being stuck in the middle.

mm is also an eldest,
so it doesn't cross his mind either.

what's the big deal?

g is the only boy
stuck in the middle
of two of the girliest girls
on the planet.

i'm starting to see how the middle kid
gets the shaft.
can't do what the eldest does,
then when they finally get their big chance,
the baby gets to "do" at the same time.
super stinky.

lately, i've been trying to think of
different things where
the "middle"
is the best part.

oreos
burgers
middle earth
donuts

can you think of any others?
here's to middles!
and oreos.

the headband

the headband was as exotic
as the woman wearing it -
wrapped up in her long black hair.

the headband was an african print,
mustard, maroon,
olive, and apricot.

the headband was simply gorgeous.
so i finally asked her,
"where in the world did you get that headband?"

i imagined the safari,
the elephants and giraffes,
the mysterious little tent with treasures for sale.

she flipped her hair with her hand and answered,
"oh, rite-aid."

wow, i should really get out more.

without further ado

i have decided to try
a gluten free diet.

so far on my list is -
rice chex
and bananas.

i realize anyone who knows me
will think me insane,
what with cakes, cookies,
doughnuts, ice cream,
making up most of my diet,
with nary a fruit or vegetable in sight.

but i'm willing to give it a go.
i will keep you posted.

any suggestions would be most welcome.

xo,
pj bananas

sunday confession

melancholy, much?

mm's iphone is here.
i was all "meh" about it,
until i learned about
angry birds.
suddenly, i love that phone.

i can't watch glee anymore.
i tried.
i think it is because
i LIVED it.
and i was teased.
a lot.
now suddenly it's cool?
meh.

i worry i might be blogged out.
so i've been thinking about a new blog.
that's not so "meh"...
my new favorite word.
can you tell?

i'm not sleeping again.
that means something is bothering me.
not sure what it is.
i've tried writing everything down.
not working.
this ended badly last time it happened.
so i am wary.
and sleepy.
and prone to complain.

mm and i washed the cars today,
just like sundays of old.
it was really nice.
the kids even helped.
there might be a light at the end of this tunnel yet.

i am reading a parenting book,
more on this later, but
the first chapter is about getting two hours to yourself.
i was most excited until i realized -
she meant two hours - a week.
i was really hoping she would say
two hours a day.
meh.

we went to a birthday party yesterday,
and the birthday girl's whole family was there.
grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins.
it made me wish we lived closer to family.

what's your sunday confession?
the confessional is open.

worth the read

personal opinion(s) aside,
this is worth the read.

All Joy and No Fun

california girls

actual conversations -
more or less.

m: can we download california girls onto the computer?
mm: sure.
m: then put it on my mp3 player?
mm: yep.

me: um, really?
mm: yeah, it's easy and probably just a buck.
me: uh, okay.

later in the car.
kids singing...
with their hands up.
mm too.
okay. and me.

"california girls
we're unforgettable
daisy dukes
bikinis on top
sun-kissed skin
so hot
we'll melt your popsicle
oh-oh-oh

california girls
we're undeniable
fine, fresh, fierce
we got it on lock
westcoast represent
now put your hands up
oh-oh-oh

sexxxx on the beach..."
(which the kids sing as six)

mm: WHAAA?!?!
me: what?
mm: did she just say?
me: yep.
mm: oh, we won't be downloading this song.
me: whew, i thought you went and got all cool on me.
mm: not that cool.
me: thank goodness.

p.s. i realize it might be "gurls" - but i'm not all that cool either.

to the nines

our baby is nine today.
i am in complete denial.

i don't know when it happened,
but suddenly she is different.
a little more self-assured,
a little less shy,
a little more comfortable in her skin.

she doesn't need me as much,
yet she still wants me around.
most of the time.

she listens, usually,
eats anything, mostly.

sometimes she asks questions,
i don't really have answers to.
that scares me a bit.

her feet are the same size as mine,
she likes to wear my high heels.
that scares me a lot.

i can't carry her to bed anymore.
even piggyback.

but she is forever our baby.
the original.

wordless thursday

a nerd never falls far from the tree.

guest blogger - papa

my work car is an 89 s-10 pickup, pretty plain even in 89. it belonged to my father-in-law, the kids' great-grandfather. it is "a beat-up work car" - peeling paint, rust, dents, much worn upholstery, etc. i think the kids like it because 1 it is different and 2 no rules. they play in it, on it, can't hurt anything. if something spills it's on top of 20 other stains. dirt isn't a a problem since it rarely gets cleaned. g'mother will ride only as a last resort. they argue over ride turns.

from m's first ride in it:

m: "what's this?" pointing to handle-knob that rolls the window up/down.

i explain.

m: "how does it work?"

i demonstrate. her face alights.

m: "can i do it?"

duh. has papa ever said "no"? window up/down for the next 15 miles. wind alternately not/blowing in our faces. best car ride ever.

m: "why don't new cars have these?"

good question. simple. reliable. can't be disabled by dad from driver's seat. permissions not required. perfect. it takes me few beats to answer. "why don't new cars have these?" humm.

"i guess they just don't make new cars as good as old ones."

answer accepted. no more questions.

note to current or prospective parents: do not allow one word questions. from "The Last Lecture" i wish i had read that a long time ago.

lucky seven

dear g,
no matter how old you are,
this is how you look inside my heart.
happy 7th birthday my sweet little man.
love,
mom

wordless thursday

prolific painter produces perfect present paper.