Out of the oven

Pajama Dad Post (mm) -

On the way back from a hike at a nearby park g, k and I were jamming to some Taylor Swift with the windows rolled down for optimal coolness.

g - "Was Taylor Swift born or adopted?"
mm - "Everyone is born." (I probably should have elaborated further, but was trying to avoid the 10 follow-up questions.)
k - "Yeah, just like Rachael Ray was born!"

Exactly what I was thinking... kind of...

41 - a top ten

you know you have been married for 41 years when...

10. you can still remember every detail of your wedding day, without watching the video - which wasn't even invented yet, just sayin'.

9. he knows that she loves to travel - she knows that he loves to stay home - and it's all good.

8. she wonders how he can spend so much at big lots - he wonders how she can spend so much at marshall's - unless it's for the grandchildren - then neither wonders.

7. you know not to mention the other's age - except at the movies.

6. she has perfected the art of dropping subtle hints - for example, taking a sledgehammer to the shower walls and dumping tile out of the bathroom window means it is time for a remodel - he, over time, has perfected the art of picking up on these subtle hints.

5. she cooked and he washed dishes for 30+ years, now both know all the cracker barrel specials - by heart.

4. he knows that she will order the turkey dinner, she knows that he will order the chicken and dumplings - no one will wash the dishes.

3. he knows to buy the roses - seriously, man, just buy the roses.

2. you can forge each other's signature with alarming accuracy.

1. you can finish each other's sentences - not only because you are so attuned to each other, but because you've already heard this story - 27 times.

happy anniversary, mom and dad!
hope you get your roses.
seriously.

sunday confession

for the past four days
m has been at gymnastics camp.
all day.
(at pitt, but let's not talk about that part)
i was a nervous wreck.

aside from her learning some awesome new skills,
(and the p.i.t.t. cheer, but let's not talk about that part)
i learned something new too.

without m,
the other two
just don't know what to do,
so they -
get along.

clearly,
m is the ringleader,
she brings the silly,
she has all the wacky ideas,
she is the catalyst of the crazy.
hmm.

and ya'll know,
even though i wouldn't change my life
for anything,
and i mean anything,

i surely can appreciate a good summer camp,
or two.

p.s. hail to pitt? really? ugh.
note to self, check into wvu's gymnastics camp.

what's your sunday confession?
the confessional is open.

made my day

i.want.one.

justice league of mama birds

the other day i went out into our backyard.
to see if we have any tomatoes yet.
our tiny garden is near a robins' nest
built in our swingset fort.

around the nest, in the fort, on the fence,
were more than 20 mama birds,
freaking out.

i immediately thought they were
stealing the baby birdies,
or trying to kill them!
(so sad, but true)

i started clapping and shooing
them away.

as i got closer i saw a GIANT
blacksnake curled up in the nest,
eating one of the baby birdies!

the mama birds of all kinds,
not just robins,
were united together,
trying to get rid of the snake.
it was amazing.

mm took his trusty hiking stick
and poked and prodded the snake
until he got annoyed and left.
he dropped the birdie that was in his mouth,
but turned and picked up another!

after some more poking,
finally he gave up,
left the birdies,
and slithered through the grass
back into the woods.

the justice league of mama birds
followed him the whole way,
squawking, screeching, pecking,
letting him know not to come back.
wow.

if my little birdies are ever in trouble,
i can only hope the justice league of mamas
will be there for me.
or at least mm with a stick.

p.s. two of the three birdies survived.
not too bad.

dinner, a rant

yesterday at 2pm
i started making dinner.

i put together a tilapia dish
with tomatoes, garlic, basil,
rice and beans.

i baked it and had it ready
in individual containers
to be heated up whenever.

problem -
my kids didn't like the tilapia.

so i made them fish sticks,
with yogurt cups,
and carrot sticks.
butterscotch pudding for dessert.

problem -
they didn't like the fish sticks either.

so i made them hot dogs.
as usual.
and i was exhausted.
the kitchen was destroyed.

and i still have to think of something for tonight.
grr.

two princes

"look mommy, a prince, he is going to marry the princess."
"how lucky for him, she is quite a catch."

"oh, he changed his mind, he is not going to marry her."
"typical - i'm sure a better prince will come along."

"yes, another prince is here!"
"two princes? as i said before, she is quite a catch."

"how will she decide which prince to marry?"
"i don't know, it could be difficult."
"eeny-meeny-miney-mo!"
"ah, well, of course."

i see you

when you
give them
a bath,
a hug,
a lecture,
or the last piece of pizza,
i see you.

when you
take them
to the park,
the pool,
the movies,
or church,
i see you.

when you
fill them
with smoothies,
giggles,
confidence,
or fill our car with gas,
yes!
i see you.

when you
empty
the dishwasher,
the laundry basket,
the trash,
the recycling,
the litter box,
or the squirt guns
onto their little heads,
i see you.

when you
teach them
to ride a bike,
to brush their teeth,
to stand tall,
to tie their shoes,
or to read a book,
i see you.

when you
listen to them
their stories,
their whining,
their noise,
oh, the noise,
their hopes,
their dreams,
their songs,
and their wacky, wacky ideas,
i see you.

when you
work
all day
then come home
and work some more,
i see you.

when you
play
legos,
cards,
computer,
freeze tag,
hide and seek,
or dodge ball,
i see you.

so, you see,
even though they might
not see you
and all you do...

i sure do.
happy father's day, mm.

retro pay

random thought #7,042.
retro pay...

if i were to get a check today
for nine years of work
at my old salary
with a 3% raise each year
~for being awesome~

it would be for
$454,082.69

well, i mean approximately,
of course.
because calcuating it out exactly
would just be c.r.a.z.y.

wordless thursday

NO! I DO NOT need a NAP!!!

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

hellcat

leave it to me,

to bring home a perfectly sweet cat,

and turn him into hellcat.

attacking our legs,

arms, hands, hair.

scratching our couches,

floors, blankets, walls.

climbing the screen door.

now there is a great debate

in our house whether

he should stay inside,

and have his claws removed,

or become an outside cat,

and roam the free world.

i'm having those chest pains again.

thoughts? advice? help!?!

sunday confession

when we leave my parents house,
m and i cry.

each time we cry a little longer.
today we cried all the way
from huntington to
charleston.
that's 42 minutes.
give or take.

someday we'll be crying
all the way back to pittsburgh.

a happy birthday to my brother!
and his beautiful wife!

what's your sunday confession?
the confessional is open.

three kids, three floors

i recently asked my friend,
who is one of three kids,
"how did your mom do it?"

she answered,
"oh, easy. three floors."

"three floors?"

"yes, she would yell at us,
you - stay here!
you - go downstairs!
and you - go upstairs!"

genius.
except for one problem.
i only have two floors.
dang.

wordless thursday

stalemate.

rule #14,342

"please do not lick the ds games."

apparently,
this is not an unwritten rule,
as previously thought.
so i'm adding it to the list.

and yes,
i said this out loud.
twice.

the gift of time

each year when school lets out,
we go to my parents house for a week.
mm joins us on the weekend.
pesky work.
it eases us into summer vacation.

the kids love it.
and so do i.
different toys,
bikes,
bubbles,
water,
and lightning bugs.

as soon as we arrive,
i receive
the gift of time.
for a whole week.

time to myself.
to sleep in.
drink hot coffee.
take a real shower.
floss!
read.
wander,
go to the movies,
eat yummy food,
watch grownup tv,
and shop.

and i am most grateful.

end of an era

tinkerbell? as if.
dora? eff dora.
disney princess? are you kidding me?
max and ruby? aw, hell no.

i am much too mature now,
at four and a half.
these, mother.
these are the sunglasses i desire.
if you please.

the end of an era.
it's funny though, i thought i'd be happier about it all.
i shall miss you, dora dear.

shopping parties

i love to go to shopping parties.
eat, drink, talk, shop, i just love it all.

i love the idea of helping out other women,
who want to have their own hours
and the freedom to be with their kids,
but mostly i just love to shop.

and i don't get to do that so much anymore.
or at least when i do, it just ain't that much fun.
(read - not worth it at all)
three kids can hinder a shopping experience.
i'm pretty sure that's why mm had kids.
so i couldn't shop anymore.
i digress.

recently i have been to two dud parties.
the parties themselves were fun,
but the products,
not so much.
for me anyway.
to each their own i suppose.

#1 signature home-something-or-other
i ordered some storage baskets,
which i later saw at big lots,
for WAY cheaper.
grr.

#2 romance-something-or-other
GAH!!!!!!!!
just, gah.
there are no words.
i ordered over-priced massage lotion.
citrus.
GAH!!!!!!!!

*this has been a pajama mom public service announcement.*

note to self -
stick to jewelry, woman.
maybe purses.
or at least kitchen gadgets for goodness sake.