alone at last

so what did i do
on my first day alone
since summer began?
for two and half glorious hours,
four days a week?

work out?*
shop?
clean house?**
yardwork?

nope.
i got in my car
and cried.
all the way home.
while sting sang
"fields of gold" -

i blubbered so much
i couldn't see the road.
everything was blurry.
i thought about
how grown-up she looked,
how she walked away so easily,
how she didn't cry even a little bit.

i thought about
never having any more babies to hold.

oh jeez.
well, there's always tomorrow.
right?

*work out, that is so funny.
**clean house, okay that might be funnier.