Monday, December 29, 2008

the queen

we are spending a wonderful week-ish in wv.

yesterday we visited my grandmother (a.k.a. maw-maw) in fayetteville. we had sunday dinner, then she decided she'd like to take her tree down. so we all pitched in and helped. the tree was down in record time.

all that was left were the bits of tree on the carpet. "get the sweeper," she said. i obeyed. i started to plug it in and she said, "oh, i didn't mean for you to have to do it."

i said, "that's okay, i am the queen of vacuuming!"

my 3-year-old looked confused and stated simply, "uh, no you're not, mommy."

busted.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

bah

dear extremely-annoying-lady-who-stole-my-parking-spot-with-your-lexus,

it is customary to put your blinker on, pull past a parallel parking spot, then back into said space. it might even be a law.

so, if you see someone obeying the law, it is not usually customary to pull in the same spot frontwards, get out, lock your car, making that grating "beek-emp" noise.

and since you did not even look at me, you did not see the lovely bird i was wanting to show you.

but, hey, merry christmas anyway - i'm glad i didn't decide to back over your little teeny car with my suv. i will not let you ruin my holiday spirit.

most sincerely,
paja-bah mom

Saturday, December 20, 2008

beans

i just asked k what she wanted for breakfast.

she thought about it and said,
"not beans."

um, ok, because your other mother usually makes that for breakfast?

Monday, December 15, 2008

obligations

ok - it's been a week - so i don't feel like i might get struck by lightning if i tell my story...

mm got a free ticket to the hockey game last monday. pens vs. sabres. a rare treat to be offered a pens ticket, extremely hard to find, and expensive! and the sabres, well, that's his team. forever.

how could i say, "are you seriously considering leaving me here in the wacky house all alone?"

i was brave, i said, "yes dear! you HAVE to go, it's the SABRES!" maybe next time macy's is open until midnight he will return the favor...

i put on my big girl pants. all i had to do was drop off m at ccd. take g to basketball practice. go back and pick up m at ccd. go pick up g at basketball. come home. baths and homework. have dinner somewhere in there. read books, brush teeth, put everyone to bed. easy, no?

we all drove over to church. this is when "it" happened. last monday was a holy day of obligation! students were to attend mass WITH their families! all i can say is - thank goodness i showered. and the younger two kids were wearing socks and shoes. oh, and i had brushed k's hair at some point during the day...

we attended mass. three kids and me. no books. no snacks. no crayons, gum, stickers, or any of our normal church-gear! it was truly - awful! and i am not even catholic! i tried to see the hidden message, was this a test? of patience? or set-up? candid camera?

on the bright side, the priest did somehow manage to include in his homily about the immaculate conception, many, many references to the "immaculate reception" - ONLY in pittsburgh, folks. that made me chuckle. and the kids were okay, not great, but okay.

and we made it through in one piece, ccd, basketball, even baths. mm got to enjoy a night out to himself. so i suppose it was worth it. all these obligations, i guess that's what grown-ups do.
dang.

Monday, December 8, 2008

mostly unsettled

each year the santa shop comes to school. and each year i request a mood ring... one year i got a sapphire/diamond ring and last year a giant solitaire.

so this year i happened to be at the school while the santa shop was set up... (one perk of being a helicopter mom)

i walked around with the kids and let them pick out some things for their siblings and themselves. then i casually put the mood ring in with their stuff. i told m there was no need to wrap it, i would just put it on. merry christmas to me!

at first i thought it was broken. it stayed on orange "unsettled." all the time.

then it spiked to blue "lovable." for a brief moment... not broken.

so basically, i am mostly unsettled as well as occasionally lovable.

sounds just about right.

Friday, December 5, 2008

sleep issues


















ok, i'll be honest. i like to sleep. there was a glorious time (before kids) that i was known to sleep 14 hours or more, especially on the weekends.

since kids, i am lucky to get 8-10 hours a night, and i know some people (mm) can get by on even less, but i am not one of these people. without sleep, i am HIGHLY irritable.

and i'll also admit, sometimes i am asleep when m gets home from gymnastics at 9pm. and sometimes, mm lets me sleep in 'til 8am on saturdays...

but seriously, do i really deserve this? really?

oh yes, folks, that would be me, in the bed... oh, and also, it's LAMINATED.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

dr. computer

today was k's well visit. three years old. i'd like to be able to say, "where did the time go?" but honestly, it seems like FOREVER since she was born... although i really can't imagine my life without her in it. any of the kids. like, what did i even do that i was so "busy" all the time?

i LOVE to go to the doctor's office. our pediatrician is the best. and this is mainly because... he always asks ME how I'M doing. am i getting out? getting some me time? going on dates? he tells me to go to the movies by myself and fall asleep! he makes sure i am sane. and whether or not any of his suggestions ever happen, he at least checks on me. and i appreciate that more than he will ever know. sweet validation. it makes me a better mom. seriously.

today happened to be the day the office went "live" with their new computer system. ok, no big deal. i'm glad they are moving on up in the world. the nurse typed in k's vitals and left us to wait for the doctor. adds an extra element of danger watching your three year old jump around a room with a brand new wall-mounted computer.

the doctor arrives. he asks us how we are, check. love that. he examines k, check. love that. then he starts asking the general questions, what's she eating, any sleeping problems, bathroom problems, etc. to which i answer, "wendy's chicken nuggets only" and "i honestly wouldn't know if she has any problems, 'cause she's the third kid"... buh-dum-dum. (i am oh-so funny)

i look over at the doctor and he is TYPING EVERYTHING i'm saying, on the new COMPUTER! forever! a record of me stating that my kid only eats chicken nuggets! i try to add some other stuff - um, yogurt and milk, and eggs... too late. i peek over his shoulder and the diet field says, "chicken nuggets predominate." AAAAAHHHHH!

great. now she will never get into harvard.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

my new vera/gianna

we spent a fabulous holiday in ny. no snow, but quite fabulous nonetheless.

i even got some shopping time. my mother-in-law took me to the vera bradley store. i picked out a backpack. i have been eyeing one for sometime. veras are quite expensive.

i picked out the perfect pattern. love at first sight. i'm checking out all the pockets. plenty of room for regular purse stuff plus random kid junk. it's perfect. the price is - gulp - $84?!?!?

i carry it around. i check out the pockets again. do i really, really want this? then i notice the tag! this bag belongs to gianna! i ask the saleslady if she has another one. she is mortified, she checks. no - but she can give me this one for 40% off!

SOLD!

and no one will ever know. except for me. and gianna.